-Adolf Hitler's mother seriously considered having an abortion but was talked out of it by her doctor.

-All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.

Richard Milhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal."
The second? William Jefferson Clinton.

Can you imagine working at the following Company?
It has a little over 500 employees with the following statistics:

- 29 have been accused of spousal abuse

- 7 have been arrested for fraud

- 19 have been accused of writing bad checks

-117 have bankrupted at least two businesses

- 3 have been arrested for assault

- 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit

- 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges

- 8 have been arrested for shoplifting

- 21 are current defendants in lawsuits

- In 1998 alone, 84 were stopped for drunk driving

Can you guess which organization this is? Give up?

It's the 535 members of your United States Congress.
The same group that perpetually cranks out hundreds
upon hundreds of new laws designed to keep the rest of us in line...
Almost 150 years ago, President Lincoln found it necessary to hire a private investigator, Alan Pinkerton, for protection. That was the beginning of the Secret Service.

Somebody sent me this and I thought it was a fitting sign of the times.

Let's see if I understand how America works lately...



If a woman burns her thighs on the hot coffee she was holding in her lap while driving, she blames the restaurant.

If your teen-age son kills himself, you blame the rock 'n' roll music or musician he liked.

If you smoke three packs a day for 40 years and die of lungcancer, your family blames the tobacco company.

If your daughter gets pregnant by the football captain you blame the school for poor sex education.

If your neighbor crashes into a tree while driving home drunk,you blame the bartender.

If your cousin gets AIDS because the needle he used to shoot heroin was dirty, you blame the government or not providing clean ones.

If your grandchildren are brats without manners, you blame television.

If your friend is shot by a deranged madman, you blame the gun manufacturer.

And if a crazed person breaks into the cockpit and tries to kill the pilots at 35,000 feet, and the passengers kill him instead,the mother of the deceased blames the airline.

I must have lived too long to understand the world as it is anymore. So if I die while my old, wrinkled ass is parked in front of this computer, I want you to blame Bill Gates, OK?

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her dead.